Outspoken: QPR midfielder Joey Barton (right) has plenty to say for himself on Twitter
Fab just can't win

And now the backlash begins. After playing the Victorian dad with disastrous consequences in South Africa, Fabio Capello has come over all touchy-feely before his final tournament next summer. Out go Austrian boot camps, in come beach holidays and Marbella.

Now, if England lose, the claim will be he was too soft on England's pampered players, when what they really needed was a kick up the knackers and a bucket of iced water in the face every morning.

As a nation, we're like Goldilocks in the way we approach international football - except we never find the porridge that's just right.

Spoty quiz

Nobody should be allowed to pontificate on sexism in the Sports Personality of the Year Awards unless they can also relay (a) Sarah Stevenson's taekwondo weight (b) the name of Kath Grainger's rowing partner (c) the nationality and identity of the swimmer who retired to make Keri-Anne Payne the fastest in the 10km open water event.

There is a lot of phoney grand-standing going on, as is the fashion these days.

Answers: (a) welterweight (b) Anna Watkins (c) Larisa Ilchenko, Russia. But then you knew that anyway, didn't you, Harriet?

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